Despair is the very worst;

bowing my head, as the sky turned black

before even engaging in battle

I was feeling defeated upfront

lost into a soul sucking abyss

of fears and insecurities

as far in as I would ever be out

another round of those same mistakes

I just kept making them again

with lightnings flashing my vision,

and seismic shifts shaking the last shred of serenity,

freezing rain pouring and soaking me to the bones,

then I realized

I wasn’t standing anymore

I was drowning

such abyss was to be my grave

the water started filling my lungs

I tried to make a sound,

but no one could hear me;

<tempus fugit>,

I immediately contemplated,

time slips away,

like a cloud,

like a wave,

like a shadow,

Was I giving in to fear and all of its friends?

A limbo divided a present self from a future self,

I was stuck in between

stumbling with myself,

pulling and pushing me away;

for the latter to live the former must collapse.

So, do

go under,


that’s when I was able to breathe in again

drowning was not bound to destroy

it was not rendered to kill;

it is a metamorphosis,

a (re)birth.

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